Westlife (1998 - 2012)

The first time


Getting more mature


Bryan has left. Only four.


The latest. Mark, Kian, Nicky, Shane. Gravity Tour 2011.


Good evening..

This morning, I got mentioned by my friend. On it, she shared a link, and when I opened that link, my tears were bursting out.

After 14 years, 26 top ten hits including 14 number one singles, 11 top 5 albums, 7 of which hit the top spot and have collectively sold over 44 million copies around the world, 10 sell out tours and countless memories that we will forever cherish, we today announce our plan to go our separate ways after a greatest hits collection this Christmas and a farewell tour next year. The decision is entirely amicable and after spending all of our adult life together so far, we want to have a well-earned break and look at new ventures. We see the greatest hits collection and the farewell tour as the perfect way to celebrate our incredible career along with our fans. We are really looking forward to getting out on the tour and seeing our fans one last time.

Over the years Westlife has become so much more to us than just a band. Westlife are a family. We would like to thank our fans who have been with us on this amazing journey and are part of our family too.

We never imagined when we started out in 1998 that 14 years later we would still be recording, touring and having hits together. It has been a dream come true for all of us.


Kian, Mark, Nicky and Shane

‘Greatest Hits’ to be released on 21st November
New Single ‘Lighthouse’ to be released 13th November

Westlife, is going to separate.

I didn't know what to say. Like they said, It's been 14 years since the first time I heard "Swear It Again" and fell in love with them. I've spent 14 years from my 23 years of age with their songs. They're the first boyband that I love. I cried when I couldn't watch their first concert. My friends and I hunted the magazine "Westlife Edition". We forced the seller to give us his last stocks.

And now, they will go on with their own lives, each one of them. I was shocked when I knew Brian left them. And now, it's even more shocking. But if this is for the best, then I wish you all a very much goodluck!

Thank you for the most wonderful 14 years of my life. You guys really are going to be missed. I'm hoping that there'll be a reunion tour or something. A complete formation of Westlife. Shane Fillan, Nicky Byrne, Mark Feehily, Kian Egan, and last but not least, Brian McFadden. I'm going to miss you all together..

Night!

Does “Muchness” still exist in our life or have we completely lost it?

“You used to be much more..."muchier." You've lost your muchness.” – Mad Hatter, Alice in Wonderland 2010.

Untuk yang sudah pernah menonton Alice in Wonderland (2010) pasti ingat dengan kata-kata tersebut. Cerita Alice in Wonderland versi tahun 2010 ini berkisah tentang Alice yang kembali ke Wonderland dengan kondisi tidak mengingat apapun yang ada di dunia tersebut. Di film diceritakan bagaimana Alice yang kembali kebingungan ketika bertemu dengan Tweedle-Dee dan Tweedle-Dum; Absolem; Chesire cat; Mad Hatter, dan lain-lain.

Saya jadi berpikir bahwa cerita Alice in Wonderland (baik versi terdahulu maupun versi tahun 2010) ini merupakan sebuah gambaran mengenai kehidupan kita. Pada Al ice in Wonderland versi jaman dulu, dikisahkan Alice yang masih kanak-kanak, melihat wonderland sebagai sesuatu yang menarik, fascinating, sebuah petualangan yang sangat menyenangkan. Demikian juga kita sebagai manusia. Ketika kita masih kecil, kita melihat dunia ini seperti taman bermain. Apapun bisa kita jadikan mainan, dari mulai ranting pohon, batu, sendok, garpu, tempat bedak, dll.

Saya ingat ketika masih kecil, saya pernah menjadikan bantal besar di ruang TV menjadi sebuah kapal kecil, atau kursi goyang rotan milik saya, saya balikan, lalu saya berpura-pura itu adalah podium, dan lain sebagainya. Saya juga pernah bermain “mencari harta karun” dengan sepupu saya di rumah tante saya. Jika ada dahan pohon yang cukup rendah atau kolam ikan, kami jadikan sebuah rintangan yang harus bisa dilewati.

Masa kecil memang masa yang paling menarik. Kalau mengambil kata-katanya Mad Hatter, masa kecil adalah masa dimana kita memiliki banyak “Muchness” dalam arti, kita masih memiliki energi yang banyak, pikiran kita masih belum “terbebani” oleh hal-hal lain sehingga kita masih bisa berimajinasi mengenai banyak hal. Ketika masih kecil, kita juga masih memandang dunia sebagai sesuatu yang penuh dengan segala kemungkinan. Pastinya masih banyak yang ingat bagaimana kita berimajinasi mengenai apa yang dikatakan oleh semut kepada semut lain? Apa yang dikatakan anjing ketika melihat kucing? Dan lain sebagainya.

Seiring dengan berjalannya waktu, kita pun menjadi dewasa. Secara psikologis, tugas perkembangan kita pun bertambah. Kita sudah mulai disibukan oleh tugas kita sebagai pelajar, sebagai remaja, dan sebagai seorang anak, seorang pekerja, seorang istri/suami, dll. Sesuatu yang dulu terlihat menarik, menjadi biasa saja di mata kita. Segala macam hal yang menurut kita dulu mungkin saja bisa terjadi, sekarang jadi sangat aneh dan sangat tidak mungkin terjadi. Kita mulai melupakan rasa penasaran kita terhadap apa yang dikatakan seekor semut ketika bertemu dengan semut yang lain, dan sebagainya.

Seiring dengan berjalannya waktu, kita semakin sering dihadapkan dengan realita-realita yang baik dan yang buruk. Semakin sering kita berinteraksi dengan banyak orang, semakin sering pula imajinasi-imajinasi kita dianggap menjadi sesuatu yang aneh dan tidak biasa. Hal yang aneh dan tidak biasa tersebut seringkali menjadi bahan olok-olok banyak orang. Ketika kita mempertanyakan sesuatu hal yang mustahil, kita akan diberikan tatapan “are you seriously asking that question?” dari lingkungan kita.

Saya jadi bertanya-tanya, apakah diantara kita masih memiliki “muchness” tersebut? Apakah diantara kita ada yang secara sadar masih mempertahankan sebagian dari "muchness" kita? Atau hal tersebut sudah benar-benar hilang dari kehidupan kita dikarenakan bertambahnya tuntutan perkembangan kita?

Kalau ditanyakan, saya akan menjawab untuk mempertahankan sebagian dari "muchness" saya. Karena menurut saya, dengan adanya "muchness" tersebut, hidup kita menjadi lebih bermakna. Dengan adanya "muchness" dalam hidup kita berarti kita masih memiliki passion dalam diri kita. Dan tanpa passion, saya rasa kita akan selalu merasa tidak puas terhadap apa yang kita miliki.

Sekian posting hari ini. Semoga bisa bermanfaat bagi Nusa dan Bangsa.

Nighty Night! :)

I'm Falling in love :)

Good evening!

See the title? Yes. I am falling deeply in love at the moment. With whom? I'm falling in love with......




THIS KIDS!!! :'D

It's been a while since I wrote the post about my special job as a teacher assistant in Special Education Department. So, I'm going to tell you about my days as a special education teacher assistant. In here, I'm assisting 2 teachers for 3 different subjects. We have Language, Math, and Bahasa Indonesia.

Before I'm talking about my activities, I want to introduce you all to my students. Based on the picture above, at the back, from left to the right: Joey, Brian and Sammy. The 2nd line (left to the right): Adela, Fikri, Jordan, Rizki, Calli, Rafi, Sylvana, and Eun Kyoung. The front line (left to the right): Nicole (or memei), Gio, and Wilbert.

Ok, as a teacher assistant, I'm dealing with almost all of them. Only fikri, Joey, Sammy and Calli that I haven't taught yet. I meet Nicole, Wilbert, Gio, Rafi, and Rizki in Language class. In Math and Bahasa Indonesia, I meet Jordan, Sylvana, Gio, Rafi, and Wilbert. I once taught Eun Kyoung, Brian and Adela for Language and Math because their main teacher had a meeting.

At first, i was afraid (wait, it's not a song :p). I was afraid that I couldn't teach them, or they didn't want to listen to me, etc. But it turns out, They are listening to me. In fact, one of them, usually tell me to give him guidance when he does his works. I was so flattered when he asked me that.

Being with them, I have to admit that it's not always happy-go-lucky kind of thing, but they surely 100% always make me smile. Last week for example, we had an art project, and I had to deal with one of them. 45 minutes in class with her, while she's throwing crayon and scratched me etc. It was bloody tiring. But on Tuesday, when we're going to practice gamelan, I, again, had to deal with this kid, and she's actually funny with her own thing.

Yes, they can play gamelan, eventhough not as perfect as the professionals, but they can play the songs that are given. Still need guidance, of course, but at least, they are able to do that. We once had a performance in JHCC some weeks ago. Everybody were just amazed by them.

I can tell you a lot of things about us, but I'm sure that this post will be very long. But one thing for sure that I love them with all my heart. They teach me many things. They teach me how to control my emotion, they teach me patience, and the most important thing is, they teach me how to love unconditionally..


-Different, But Not Less- Temple Grandin.

Nighty night!

AC Milan Glorie vs Indonesia All-Star Legends

Morning!

Jadi kemarin, saya dan 4 orang teman saya menonton Milan Glorie di GBK. Para legenda AC Milan bertanding melawan Legenda Indonesia. Dengan sangat antusias, saya mengenakan Jersey AC Milan saya. Sesampainya di sana, sudah berkumpul para Milanisti Indonesia. Mendengar chant2 yang mereka keluarkan menambah keseruan suasana di GBK.

Ketika sudah memasuki stadion utama GBK, suasana pun tambah seru. Apalagi ketika para legenda sedang melakukan warming up. Sulit dipercaya, saya yang beberapa tahun yang lalu hanya menonton Dida, Serginho, dan Costacurta dari TV, sekarang menonton mereka live!

Pertandingan pun dimulai. Awal babak pertama, Tim Milan Glorie terus menyerang. Sampai akhirnya Serginho berhasil mencetak Hattrick. Babak pertama agak kurang seru menurut saya. Pertandingannya sedikit monoton. Pada saat istirahat, kami pun kembali melihat Milan Glorie melakukan warming up. Beberapa saat kemudian, babak kedua pun dimulai. Posisi kiper Milan Glorie digantikan oleh Taibi. Beberapa menit kemudian, saya melihat sesosok jangkung menjulang menggunakan kostum bernomor 32 memasukin lapangan. Saya pikir siapa, ternyata dia adalah.. DIDA! Whaaaat???? Hahahaha... Penonton pun pada bersorak ketika Dida mulai menggiring bola. Dan.. Tidak beberapa lama setelah Dida masuk lapangan, dia pun mencetak Goal melalui sundulan kepalanya. Tidak hanya hebat sebagai keeper, tapi ternyata Dida juga berbakat menjadi Striker!

Pertandingan pun berakhir dengan skor 1-5 untuk kemenangan Milan Glorie. Serginho berhasil menyarangkan 4 goal, sedangkan Dida 1 goal. Dari team Indonesia, Ricky Yakobi menyumbangkan 1 goal.

Pertandingan persahabatan ini cukup memuaskan menurut saya. Meskipun saya tidak terlalu mengenal para pemain legenda kita, tetapi para bapak2 tersebut patut diacungi 1000 jempol. Meskipun kita kalah, tetapi menurut saya permainan mereka cukup bagus. Meskipun saya tidak mendapatkan tanda tangan Dida, Costacurta dan Serginho, serta para pemain Milan lainnya, saya tetap senang! Semoga tahun depan Giliran Para legenda Bayern Muenchen yang datang.. :D

Harry Potter

Hi!

Just watched Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows part 2. Thank God that the government wasn't that stupid :p Anyway, it was, awesomely awesome. I cried and laughed at the same time. I even have cried before the movie was started.. :p

Anyway, Harry Potter has already been my BFF (borrowing Echies phrase) since I was 13 y.o. At first, I didn't like to read it, until I accidentally read my friends book. Since then, I can't stop reading it. Harry Potter has given me a beautiful childhood memory. I grew up with the characters. I used to dislike some of the characters (Snape, Draco, and even the dark lord). But lately, I fancy them too. They're giving some life to the stories.

I'd like to thank J.K. Rowling, Chris Colombus, David Yates, Daniel Radcliffe, Ruppert Grin, Emma Watson, and all the players for making a good stories, for visualizing it awesomely. I don't think I will have another favorite story like Harry Potter.

My Special Job

Good evening!

I've told you guys before that I'd become a teacher assistant for special education department in Sekolah Cita Buana. Nah, hari ini saya sudah bertemu dengan ke-14 anak-anak muridnya. Ada Sammy (paling ganteng), Brian (jago gambar), Joey (ABAS, Anak Basket), Rafi (paling bawel), Rizqi (kalau ngomong masih suka kebolak-balik), Sylvana (paling anggun), Calli (sekali giggle, susah berhenti), Adela (masih agak sulit untuk mengenal dia, maybe next time I'm gonna be able to describe her), Fikri (kalau ngomong merepet), Gio (paling imut, literally), Jordan (agak pemalu), Eun Kyoung (She's nice, mudah berinteraksi), Wilbert (pintar, tapi masih suka ngawang mengingatkan saya sama salah satu anak di Montessori dulu), Nicole (pintar, agak kemayu).

Di antara mereka ber-14, Wilbert dan Nicole adalah anak baru dan mereka yang paling kecil. Rata-rata umur mereka 7-12 tahun, kalau tidak salah, Joey bilang kalau dia sebentar lagi akan berulang tahun yang ke-12. Hari pertama ini saya belum bisa bercerita banyak. Selama seminggu ini mungkin bisa dibilang akan jadi masa-masa PDKT saya ke mereka. Karena nantinya saya akan mendampingin beberapa anak yang akan mengikuti kelas di mainstream.

Oh iya, saya belum bercerita sistem di sekolah Cita Buana ini. Jadi selain ada TK - SMA, SCB ini juga memiliki Special Education Department. Di departemen ini ada 3 unit, SN (special needs Unit), LC (learning Center), dan TEC (Transfer of Education Center) CMIIW. Di unit SN itu untuk anak-anak usia 7-12 yang masih harus berlatih basic skills, sedangkan di LC itu adalah anak-anak berusia 7-12 tahun yang sudah mampu latih (sudah bisa berinteraksi dan menangkap pelajaran, CMIIW again). Sedangkan TEC itu untuk anak-anak usia 12-18 tahun yang masih harus berlatih basic skills (again, CMIIW). Nah, untuk beberapa anak, mereka akan mengikuti pelajaran di kelas mainstream (integrasi) untuk mengikuti pelajaran selain pelajaran yang di ajarkan di unit-unit tersebut (kalau di LC: Language, Math, B. Indonesia) sekaligus melatih kemampuan sosial mereka juga.

Nah, nantinya saya akan menemani beberapa anak untuk pergi ke kelas mainstream untuk mengikuti pelajaran di sana. Perasaan saya saat ini campur aduk, antara excited dan cemas. Excited karena saya memiliki kesempatan untuk membantu mereka memahami pelajaran-pelajaran di kelas mainstream, namun di satu sisi, saya cemas, apakah saya akan bisa membantu mereka mengikuti kelas tersebut. Well.. We'll see about that. Yang pasti untuk pertama, mungkin saya akan didampingin oleh salah seorang guru dari LC juga. Mungkin setelah beberapa saat saya akan menemani mereka sendiri.

I really can't wait to see what would happen tomorrow and the next day and the next day. It's so exciting!! :D


Have a good night!

Pretending

You'll see me smiling
You'll see me laughing
You might think I'm Ok
You might think I'm fine
You might think I'm strong enough

But the truth, is hidden inside me

Take a good look
You'll see tears
In my smile and in my laugh

I'm not strong enough
I'm not Ok
I'm not fine.

But don't worry
I'll try to be..

Disappoinment

Good Evening!

Actually, I don't know what to write. I just want to spit these things inside my head. Here it goes.

At first, It was exciting and great. I admit that I assumed (or hoped) that there would be something good from it. But, it turned out as a disappointment. Gue ngga sedih, ngga marah karena ngga jadi. Gue sedih dan kecewa karena gue pikir dia cukup gentle untuk bisa berhadapan langsung dengan gue untuk ngomongin hal ini. Instead of talking right in front of me, he decided to, slowly, disappear from my life. You can't just come into somebody's life, and leave without permission. That's just rude.

Anyway, I'm not blaming anyone. At least I can learn something from it. :)



Cheers! :)

Just A Thought

Good Evening!

Mau cerita sedikit. Tapi sebelumnya, mohon maaf kalau ada pihak-pihak yang tersinggung. Sumpah ngga bermaksud jelek. Jadi, kemarin ini, di twitter baru muncul akun baru yang bernama @SaveStreetChild. Gue pun tertarik untuk ikutan. Gue follow lah tuh kan. Ternyata ada facebook dan blognya. Gue buka lah 2 situs tersebut. Pas gue lihat siapa yang memprakarsai, gue kagum,terharu, sedih, dan merasa tertampar. Campur aduk deh.


Gue kagum dan terharu sama para mahasiswa dari Universitas Paramadina. Disaat kayak gini, mereka masih mau memikirkan anak-anak jalanan tersebut. Disaat orang-orang banyak yang mencibir anak-anak jalanan, mereka justru berusaha meraih anak-anak jalanan tersebut dan mau melakukan sesuatu untuk mereka. Mereka ini memberikan inspirasi yang sangat tinggi kepada semua masyarakat. Sampai-sampai mereka sudah punya cabang di Surabaya, Medan, Makassar dan Bandung. Hebat kan?! Hebat! Gue sangat-sangat senang ada yang mau mulai bergerak untuk bikin komunitas semacam ini. 1 Trilyun jempol untuk kalian. :)

Gue sedih dan merasa tertampar. Pasti pada bingung ya, kenapa gue sedih. Gue sedih, karena ide tersebut, kegiatan ini, munculnya justru dari mereka yang kuliahnya di Universitas swasta yang mana tentunya tidak seperti kami-kami ini yang kuliah di Universitas Negeri, yang (katanya) dibayarin rakyat. Mereka yang uang kuliahnya tidak dibayari oleh rakyat, justru malah mau bersusah payah untuk bikin kegiatan semacam ini. Mereka justru mau merangkul anak-anak jalanan. Dan ya, Gue merasa tertampar.

Jujur, gue malu. Gue kuliah di Universitas Negeri, yang katanya uang kuliahnya sebagian pakai duit rakyat. Dulu waktu jaman-jaman ospek, sebagai MaBa, kami pernah diperkenalkan kepada yang namanya Tri Dharma Perguruan Tinggi, yang kalau tidak salah isinya itu: Pengajaran, Penelitian, dan Pengabdian kepada Masyarakat. Terus kalau tidak salah lagi, para Mahasiswa Baru juga diperkenalkan kepada 3 peran mahasiswa yaitu: Agent of Change, Social Control, dan Iron Stock. Sejujurnya gue juga masih ngawang sih kalau masalah 3 peran tersebut.

Entah guenya yang selama jadi mahasiswa terlalu ignorant, skeptis, dan apatis, entah gimana. Tapi kok gue tidak melihat adanya pengabdian para mahasiswa ke masyarakat ya? Okelah, setiap fakultas punya yang namanya "Departemen Pengabdian Masyarakat" atau "Sosial Masyarakat" di BEMnya. Gue sempet masuk sebagai salah satu anggota PengMas. Selama berkegiatan di BEM tersebut kami pernah pergi ke daerah Jakarta Utara untuk mengajar anak-anak nelayan di situ. Terus kami dan teman-teman dari BEM UI juga pernah ke daerah Pelumpang untuk melihat salah satu rumah singgah untuk anak-anak jalanan. Di sana mereka ada rumah singgah plus sekolah untuk anak-anak tersebut. Kurang tau juga gimana kelanjutannya sih. Masih banyak juga kegiatan-kegiatan yang dilakukan.

Lepas dari itu semua. (setau gue) Belum pernah ada yang mau capek-capek bikin sebuah komunitas seperti "Save Street Child" ini. Ketika menyebutkan mahasiswa UI, gue pasti akan kebawa. Itu juga kenapa gue bilang, gue malu. Gue pun malu sama diri gue sendiri. Gue sering kepikiran untuk bikin sekolah gratis untuk anak-anak jalanan, tapi, belum terealisasikan sama sekali. Apakah kita ini orang-orang NATO? Yang bisanya cuma ngomong doang, tapi ngga pernah ada aksi apa-apa? Bisanya kasih kritik doang, tapi ngga kasih solusi sama sekali? Atau mungkin guenya yang dulu terlalu ignorant sampai melewatkan beberapa kegiatan-kegiatan kayak gini? Mungkin karena tuntutan akademis juga yang menghambat kita untuk membuat komunitas seperti ini?

Anyhow, Tulisan ini bukan untuk menjelek-jelekan atau apa. Tulisan ini pure gue buat based on my own feelings. Goodluck untuk para calon Mentor, Goodluck untuk pengurus Save Street Child! Semoga makin berkembang dan makin bisa membantu para anak-anak jalanan di Indonesia untuk bisa berkarya. :)


Have a blessed life! Cheers! :)

Ambitious: Am I or am I not?

Selamat malam!

Mau agak serius dikit ah. Tiba-tiba pengen ngebahas mengenai "ambisius". He? Kenapa tiba-tiba gue yang dodol ini ngomongin hal berat ya? Gue sendiri juga bingung. Ditengah-tengah gue harus ngerevisi 6 jobdescs hasil validasi, tiba-tiba keingetan, Mama pernah bilang, gue itu orangnya ambisius. Klo gue mau sesuatu, pasti gue akan berusaha sekeras mungkin untuk mencapai sesuatu tersebut. Tapi di sisi lain, gue (dan mungkin beberapa orang lainnya) terkadang berpikir kalo gue itu ngga ambisius.

Hm.. Oke, mama sering mencontohkan keambisiusan gue dengan suatu masa dimana gue lagi pengen banget naik sepeda. Gue latihan sendiri sampe jatoh, 3 hari kemudian, gue udah lancar ngebut. Gue juga bingung sih kenapa itu yang selalu dijadiin contoh sama mama. Apa karena gue dulu lebih sering menghabiskan waktu gue sepedaan dibandingin belajar? Errrr... Who knows.. :p

Anyway, gue pribadi terkadang suka tidak menganggap diri gue ini ambisius. Iya gue saat itu emang lagi pengen-pengennya naik sepeda, dibeliin sepeda, sayang dong klo cuma dibiarin ngejogrok di garasi. Lagian saat itu gue lagi pengen banget (sok-sok) main sama anak-anak sepantaran gue di situ. Tapi that's it. It was just lasted for.. a few weeks.

Tapi pernah suatu waktu, gue dibilang klo gue ngga ambisius karena gue lebih memilih untuk jadi guru yang mungkin gajinya ga seberapa dibandingin sama pekerja kantoran. Ya, gue ga bisa nyalahin juga sih, mengingat papa, mama, dan kakak-kakak gue termasuk orang-orang pekerja kantoran yang hebat. Papa, dulu kerja hampir 17 tahun. Mama, sampe sekarang masih kerja sebagai editor, disayang bosnya, Teteh, well.. Klo mau diceritain, bisa besok malem lagi baru kelar. Yes, she's in a very good position now and also loved by her boss. Aa'? He works hard as a lawyer, dan lagi-lagi disayang sama bosnya. Gue? Masih piyik lah.. Paling kecil, paling dodol, paling bontot lah.. Hahaha..p

Dulu gue pernah pengen banget jadi career woman. Kerja kantoran, duduk di ruangan, tanda-tangan kertas-kertas, dapet duit lumayan. Yes, I used to dream about that, but not anymore karena makin ke sini, kerjaan kayak gitu bikin gue bosen. Kerja dari jam 8.30an sampe jam 5an, di depan komputer, di dalem petakan,hell to the no for me. That's just not me. Ternyata makin ke sini, gue makin merasakan sesuatu yang lebih dari berinteraksi dengan anak-anak (preschool-primary). Apalagi kemaren abis demo teaching di Cita Buana (I got the job, Alhamdulillah), ada satu anak (he's autistic) yang nanyain kabar gue, nanyain gue mau kemana, nanyain apakah gue besok dateng lagi. It's priceless.

Ya, gue mau jadi guru, merangkap Psikolog (atau Psikolog merangkap guru? sama bae itu sih menurut gue ya..). Panjang kronologis kenapa gue kekeuh mau jadi guru, guru anak-anak special needs lagi. Singkat cerita, seperti yang pernah gue tulis di blog sebelumnya (bukan yang sebelum ini ya), gue mau jadi psikolog klinis anak, gue pengen kuliah di luar negeri (UK), dan karena mahal, gue harus dapet scholarship. Untuk dapet scholarship itu, either gue harusp punya IPK bagus (di atas 3), atau gue punya pengalaman, atau keduanya. Karena IPK gue pas-pasan, 3 aja ga sampe, maka mau ngga mau gue harus punya pengalaman 1-2 tahun dan seinget gue, pengalamannya itu harus dibidang yang emang nantinya akan kita ambil. So, yes, here I am. Proudly introducing myself as A Special Education Teacher Assistant. :).

Jadi sebenernya gue ini ambisius atau ngga sih? Klo gue memandang diri gue sekarang, ya, gue ambisius. Tapi mungkin kalo orang luar ngeliat gue, membandingkan gue dengan mama atau teteh atau aa', mungkin gue akan terlihat tidak ambisius (atau mungkin kurang ambisius). Terkadang agak "nyess" sih gue kalo dibilang gue kurang ambisius karena gue tidak berkarier seperti mama atau teteh. Tapi ya, this is me. I don't like cubicles (but I love the outfits :p). I want to be a teacher and a psychologist. Working with kids, interacting with them. That's what I want to do. That's what my ambition is. :)


Have a wonderful life! Cheers!

A New Book

Good Evening..

Langsung aja ya. Jadi hari ini, gue pergi untuk medical check up di Mahakam sama mama. Abis itu kita ke RSPI untuk ke dokter kulit buat tangannya mama. Dari situ, seperti biasa, mama mengajak gue ke PIM buat makan siang. Setelah makan siang, gue dan mama pun pergi ke spot utama di PIM, yaitu Gramedia. Pas gue lagi lihat-lihat buku, "jreng jreng" (lebay). Ada buku "Cheers, UK!". Wow. Apa nih? pikir gue. Gue baca sehalaman dua halaman, itu yang namanya jantung gue, langsung jadi cepat. Tiba-tiba sesek pengen nangis.

Call me drama queen, norak, dan sebagainya. Gue akui, semenjak tahun lalu, keinginan gue untuk balik lagi ke UK untuk kuliah itu jadi makin gila. Gue sampai punya kertas-kertas yang isinya perhitungan dana yang gue butuhin selama di sana dan perhitungan dana yang gue punya. Gue juga udah mulai browsing soal tempat tinggal, dll. Gila? Yes. Tapi kalau kata mama, yang kayak gitu gpp dilakuin. Namanya gue lagi picturing mimpi gue. Aamiin! Semoga terwujud.

Anyway, kembali ke buku "Cheers, UK!". Gue belum baca semua sih. Baru halaman-halaman awal. Sampai di rumah, gue langsung nyari nama pengarangnya di Facebook. Sekalian gue add, sekalian gue kirim message. Kenapa? Karena biasanya orang-orang (at least, gue) pasti males kan kalau dapet friend request dari orang yang ngga dikenal. Eh, ngga taunya, message gue dibales! Akhirnya kita ngobrol-ngobrol tentang masalah scholarship dll. Tadinya gue udah hopeless untuk coba apply Chevening. Tapi katanya mbak Citra, dia punya teman yang IPKnya juga dibawah 3, tapi bisa lolos Chevening. Jadilah gue bersemangat untuk coba apply Chevening.

Semoga aja dengan gue beli buku ini, dengan gue kenal sama authornya, chance gue untuk bisa kuliah di sana bisa lebih besar. Bukan berarti kalau gue kenal authornya gue bisa gampang dapet scholarship, tapi siapa tau gue bisa belajar dari dia tentang masalah scholarship dan perkuliahan di luar kan? Who knows.. :)

Well.. Cuma mau cerita itu sih.. Bismillah. I believe with the power of mind, karena ada yang bilang "stop saying I hope, or maybe. Start saying I can and will be" :)

Have a great weekend!

June 5th 1949 - June 11th 2007

"Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven
Will it be the same
If I saw you in heaven"
-Eric Clapton-

It's already 4 years. Time flies so fast. I sometimes ask myself, would my Dad remember me when we meet in Heaven? I don't know yet whether I get the heaven or hell. BUT, if I went to heaven, would he remember me? Would you, Pah? I hope you'd still remember me. o Let me tell you something about my dad. He’s an amazing man.

My dad was born on June 5^th 1949 and passed away on June 11^th 2007. He went to ITB. He’s a smart man (academically and non-academic). He used to teach me math when I was in Elementary (I used to reject his lessons tho.. Well Back then, we’re all thinking that our teacher is everything, right?). He could fix the TV, the radio, etc. He had a good sense of music, he also taught me some basic of piano, he played piano, guitar, harmonica. He’s a multitalented man, don’t you think? :p

That’s only his skills that I talked about. Now about his traits. He’s a very patient, humble, and kind person. As I remember, I never seen him get angry to anyone, and I mean never ever ever. Once, on the road, there’s this stupid asshole riding a motorbike, and he gave his middle finger to my father. I told him to put some speed to the car because I wanted to yell or even throw something to that guy, but he refused. He said, “let him.. It’s ok”. See how patient he was.

I remember how he helped me when I had tasks from the school organization. Also when OSPEK time in University, my dad helped me with the name tag etc. When I was in HS, I used to go to school with my dad. He had to wake up early so that we could go at 5.45 or 6 am. He would arrive at his office around 7 or 8am and slept for a while inside the car because his office was still locked. :') He sacrificed a lot for me (and also for my brother and sister).

Well.. That's my father. Such a great man.. :') I'm gonna miss him for the rest of my life. I love you Pah. Maybe you rarely heard it from me, but I do.. Rest in Peace, pah. Till we meet again.. :*



Have a nice weekend people! Cherio! :*

No Boudaries by Kris Allen

Seconds hours so many days
You know what you want but how long can you wait
Every moment lasts forever
Then you feel you've lost your way
What if my chances were already gone
I started believing that I could be wrong
But you give me one good reason
To fight and never walk away
So here I am still holding on

With very step you climb another mountain
Every breath it's harder to believe
You make it through the pain
Weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing
Just when you think the road is goin' nowhere
Just when you almost gave up on your dreams
They take you by the hand
And show you that you can
There are no boundaries
There are no boundaries

I fall to the land there to stand on the edge
What if today was as good as it gets
I don't know where the future's headin'
But nothing's gonna bring me down
I've jumped every bridge and I've run every light
I've risked bein' safe and I always knew why
I always knew why
So here I am still holdin' on

With every step you climb another mountain
Every breath it's harder to believe
You make it through the pain
Weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing
Just when you think the road is goin' nowhere
Just when you almost gave up on your dreams
They take you by the hand
And show you that you can

You can go higher
You can go deeper
There are no boundaries
Above and beneath you
Break every rule 'cause
There's nothing between you and your dreams

Yep! There's nothing between us and our dreams. There are no boundaries.. Bismillah.. :D

How Much Long Should I Wait?

Maybe I was too excited at the first that I didn't take everything slowly.
I shouldn't have rushed myself so hard.
I'm kinda tired now at the moment.
Where are we heading to?
Shall we continue this, or shall we end this thing?
Just tell me,
How much long should I wait?

Entertain, Entertaintment, Entertainer

Good Morning!

Let's make it as quick as possible. Dear ENTERTAINERS, you guys live in the ENTERTAINMENT world, what you are doing, is ENTERTAIN us. So for this world's sake, please STOP saying that you're living in the entertain world. Thank you!

Have a good day! :)

Single and Content

Evening!

You guys maybe asking "what's with the title?" (Ngarep). Gue lagi kepikiran beberapa hal, salah satunya ya, itu. Single and Content. That's how I feel about myself. As my close friends, some of you must be know that I've been single for almost 23 years (and that means no bf at all). Some of you might be asking me, "why?". Gue sendiri juga bingung. Untuk beberapa waktu, gue emang pengen banget punya pacar. Tapi sebenernya, gue juga ga segitu desperate-nya untuk punya pacar.

Gue sempet deket sama beberapa cowok, tapi yaudah, ujungnya ga ada yang jadi. Entah itu dari guenya, entah itu dari cowoknya. Kayak waktu di SMP, gue sempet ditembak sama temen cowok gue, gue tolak. Karena emang gue nganggep dia temen, ga lebih. SMA, gue emang males pacaran (that, I just realised it now). Kuliah, *sigh*, gue sempet deket sama 2 orang (ngga dalam waktu yang bersamaan). Pertama, kenalan gue waktu naik gunung. He's a good guy, but apparently, he's not that good for me. Kedua, kenalannya temen gue. He's a wonderful and amazing person. Cuma yaudah, ga jadi. Berakhir gantung dan akhirnya, so long farewell.

Gue jadi bertanya-tanya, ini salahnya dimana ya? Apakah guenya yang terlalu picky, atau emang mereka bukan jodoh gue. Klo guenya yang terlalu picky, bukannya kita musti nyari yang terbaik? Dan gue (ternyata, setelah gue pikir-pikir) pengennya emang nyari buat yang lama (sampe nikah gitu). Klo emang gue nyarinya pacar buat nikah, ya udah pasti harus yang bagus dong (dalam segala aspek). Gue ngga mau nyari calon yang sembarangan. Minimal, dia harus kayak papa. My father was almost perfect. He knew almost everything. From techical stuffs, financial, academic, music, etc.

Mungkin juga, gue masih jomblo sampe sekarang, karena emang gue masih belom ngerasa perlu punya pacar. I'm comfortable enough with myself. Besides, I still have a lot of things to think about. Salah satunya adalah gimana caranya gue bikin nyokap gue bangga dan gimana caranya gue bisa ngeraih cita-cita gue (which I wrote on the previous post). Gue masih musti jadi Psikolog, gue masih musti ngumpulin duit buat kuliah lagi. Klo gue udah bisa nerusin S2, mungkin gue udah akan tenang. Jadi sebenernya, gue emang jomblo, karena gue masih mau ngurusin diri sendiri dulu. Gue masih belom mau diribetin sama urusan perpacaran (apalagi kalo ngeliat temen gue pacarnya suka bikin migraine berkepanjangan *no offense*).

Tapi, bukan berarti gue menutup hati gue. Nope. Kata orang, Rezeki, jodoh itu ditangan Tuhan. Tapi ada lagi yang bilang, "iya di tangan Tuhan. Tapi klo kita ngga mencoba untuk ngambil dari tangan Tuhan, kapan dapetnya?". Bener juga sih itu, klo kita cuma minta doang, doa doang, tapi ngga usaha, sama aja boong. Jadi ya, gue sih terbuka aja anaknya. Tapi mungkin karena terlalu picky-nya gue, dan karena terlalu sayang dan terlalu nyamannya gue sama diri gue, gue terkadang jadi punya pikiran, gue ngga mau diri gue disakitin. Karena sebenernya, my heart was torn appart, so I told myself that I won't let my heart be torn apart by anyone else again. Makanya mungkin gue jadi terkesan cuek kali ya? Cuek ngga sih gue? Ga tau deh.. :p Gue ngga mau aja ketika gue sudah melibatkan diri gue pada suatu hubungan (meskipun belom jadi pacar), tiba-tiba gue kayak dilepasin dari hubungan itu. Kayak ceritanya nabi siapa tuh yang nak perahu terus dia disuruh terjun ke laut? Nah. Gue ngga mau, gue udah masuk ke perahu itu, kita udah sama-sama naik perahu itu, ketika perahunya kenapa-kenapa dan kita emang musti keluar dari perahu itu, ya udah berenang sama-sama. Kan naiknya juga barengan. Jangan guenya malah disuruh berenang sendiri. Ogah banget gue. (ngerti ngga? Hahaha :D)

Anyway, I have something (or I think we both have) with this one guy, thanks to my friend. Gue ngga tau ini perahunya bakal terus atau ngga, kalaupun perahunya terus, alhamdulillah, kalau ngga, semoga gue ngga disuruh berenang sendirian. Klo diliat dari naga-naganya, ya.. We'll see lah.. Bismillah aja gue.. :p


And that's all.. :D Agak sedikit berantakan ya.. Ya.. Mudah-mudahan yang baca pada ngerti. Hahaha. :D

Nighty night! :D

My dream post

Good Morning! Today I'm going to make a "Dream Post". What is a "Dream Post"? You all might know about the "Dream Board" thing right? "Dream Board" is a board on where you put your dream places, dream jobs, things that you want, everything. Usually, you hang the "Dream Board" in your bed room, or cubicle, or anywhere possible so you can always see it. Shortly, a "Dream Board" is something that you use for picturing the future. My mama said, if we did that, hopefully (with all the prayers and the struggling) we could reach our dreams.

Due to the lack of the color ink to print the pictures, I'm going to put those pictures on here.

Money This represents my savings. This also represents the scholarship that I'm longing to get to continue my study. Bismillah.


United Kingdom. As you all maybe notice, I'm in love with UK. Thanks to my father, and Robin Hood (and my mama for letting me accompanied her last year) :D I've promised myself that I will go back to there. Bismillah.


Postgraduate. In Essex, England, there's this University that I really want to go to continue my study. I want to become a Clinical Child Psychologist, and the only University in UK that has A Clinical Child Psychology course, is Anglia Ruskin University. Bismillah.

Clinical Child Psychologist. Yes, I want to be a Clinical Child Psychologist. That has been my dream since I was in 12th grade. Bismillah.



School. I want to have 3 kinds of school. First is a preschool, a school for special needs children (also with the clinic), and a school for the poor children. Bismillah. :)




Wedding. Okay ladies, who doesn't want to get married? I don't know, but it's definitely not me. And perhaps, in a few years, while I'm pursuing my dream as a psychologist, I will meet my prince charming. Yes. I'm a Disney Princess holic Bismillah. :p

Travel Around UK. Like I said, I'm in love with UK and there are a lot of places that I haven't visited yet. Hence, I will go there again, and visit all landmarks in UK. I'm talking about UK, that means, England, Ireland, and Scotland. Bismillah. :D



Travel Around Europe. Yes. I love this continent. A lot of histories, a lot of landmarks to visit. Italy: Sicily, Milan, Venice, and Rome. Austria, France, Greece, and many more. Bismillah.








Louboutin. Dear Mr. Louboutin, thank you for making a beautiful shoes ever. I hope I can buy it with my own money (or.. Maybe my future husband will buy it for me.. :p). Bismillah. :D



And that's all for today. Although it's not finished yet because i still have a lot of things to be put on my "Dream Post" or my "Dream Board". :D

Have a nice day!! :D

Thoughts In The Middle Of The Night

Evening!

Tadi pas pulang, di bus naiklah seorang pengamen. Blablabla dia ngomong pembukaan, mulai ngegenjrenglah dia. Nyanyilah dia lagi "Ayah". For all this time, that song had no meaning for me. Baru setelah papa ga ada, tiap denger lagu itu, bawaannya jadi nyesek. Yea, it's been 4 years already, I know, life goes on and everything. Kadang-kadang klo inget papa juga ga selalu sedih sih. Kadang-kadang bisa jadi becandaan gue sama mama, teteh, sama aa. Cuma terkadang, klo emang gue lagi sendiri dan lagi kangen banget, bawaannya jadi pengen nangis. I'm not asking to be pitied or anything, cuma mau numpahin aja. Kata orang kan ngga boleh ditahan-tahan ya. Sedangkan klo gue cerita sama mama, takut mama nangis juga.

Anyway, Kemaren pas pulang naik bus, tiba-tiba ada bapak sama anak ceweknya (kayaknya dibawah gue sih umur anaknya) naik. Tiba-tiba gue keingetan, waktu pas gue lagi jalan-jalan sendirian di Kensington Park, ada bapak-bapak gitu lagi jalan sama anak ceweknya (sekitar 5 tahunan kayaknya). Kayaknya dia baru ngejemput anaknya dari sekolah. Gue jadi inget dulu waktu SMA gue selalu dianter papa ke sekolah, kadang papa ngejemput gue dari EF. Papa dulu ngebela-belain sampe kantor jam 7, tidur di mobil karena kantornya belom buka, biar bisa nganter gue dulu. Gue suka ngerasa bersalah deh, dulu gue kan ngantuk banget klo pagi, jadi gue tidur klo di mobil. I'm sorry pah.. :( A lot of things that I want him to know about my life now. About me graduating, having a job, about everything.

Kemaren ini, sebelum gue sidang, gue mimpi papa dateng ke sidang gue. Well, Wallahualam ya, kita ngga tau. Tapi gue cuma mau mikir klo itu emang papa dateng (diijinin sama Allah) buat ngasih semangat ke gue. A few days before I went to Tonjong just to have "a little talk" with him. Itu pertama kalinya dalam beberapa lama, tumpah semua disitu. Untung ngga ada siapa-siapa, jadi gue bisa bebas. I felt content afterwards. Terkadang gue pengen bisa "kabur" lagi bentar ke sana buat "ngobrol". It's been so long, Papa udah jarang dateng ke mimpi Neng lagi kan.. :( Please do "mampir" to my dream for a while, Pah.. Minta ijin bentar gitu sama Allah.. :p

Hah! Tumpah semua (udah semua ya? Kayak masih ada yang ganjel.. Ntar aja deh.. Hehehehe..). Goodnight everyone!

Me and The Kiddos

So.. Last week was my first week working as a Teacher (Yes, I'm a Teacher!!!!). A Pre-School Teacher Assistant to be exact. It's totally different than when I worked as a recruiter. I, officially, say that I don't fancy working in front of PC. In here, I meet a different kinds of children. From the easiest ones to the hardest ones. I also meet some good people and, well like mama and my friend said "welcome to the work life", not a very kind people. The most important (and the most precious) thing is, I can watch those kids laughing, shouting for answering questions, asking some amusing questions, and many more.


Anyway, before I forgot, in Nasional Montessori, there are 5 levels of class, Playgroup (1.5 - 2.5 years old); Toddler (2.5 -3 years old); Nursery (3-4 years old); Kindergarten (4-5 years old); Preparatory (5-6 years old). At the first week, I had a chance to join the Preparaoty Class. I joined there with 3 other teachers, teacher Leinz, teacher Hotma, and teacher Hilda. There are 20-is kids: Monica, Jolly, Alliyah (Ally), William, Rueben, Zoey, Jossie, Ashley, Cliff, Isabelle, Kei, Carlsson, Joshua (the most handsome kid), Caroline, Josh, Nicholas, Rainier, Nicole, Georgia, Zachary, and another one I forgot his name (sorry kiddo!). They're, in average, 4-5 y.o.

I got confused at first, but thanks to them, I could interact with them easily. There's this one kid, William, he's the first one that asking my name and then suddenly, some of the kids, knew my name. Thank you William! They're very smart. When we're (teacher Leinz was at the front) discussing about the Solar System, Rueben asked "teacher, what makes us all 6 years old??" Teacher Leinz and I were smilling (holding our laugh). There was this one day, when she asked them to describe about Isabelle (oh, she's Ayu Azhari and Mike Tramps daughter, her brother, Lennon is in here too, he's in the baby class, I'll tell you about him later), Joshua (that handsome kid) said "Isabelle is.... pretty" and he sits and blushed. So CUTEEEE!!!! >_<

At the second week, which is this week, I join the kindergarten class. There are 10 kids or so here: Charlene, Rafael, Kenzie, Dea (She's Zacharys sister), Farah, Anthony, Diego, Jeff, Liam, Shana, Cayden, Angie, Elaine. On monday (my first day), they kept looking at me like I was an alien or something. But after that, these past 3 days, we can get along very well. :D In this class, I join teacher Madhu and teacher Feany. At first, these kids were so quite. But then, they start shouting while answering questions. Lol. I know it's kinda annoying and they need to be stopped, but it's just funny seeing them like that. :p

I also try the baby class (playgroup and toddler) and the nursery for a few times. In the baby class, there are some kids that I fancy a lot: Calvin (he's Carlssons brother), Ezel, and Malik (this one is everyones favorite, he's Farahs Brother). I'll get their pictures next time. So, Calvin is the first kid that interacts with me from the first time. He smiled when I came to him while he's eating his breakfast, taking pictures of me with his babysitters phone, etc. And there's Ezel! I love him when he's doing a bow in front of the class. So, in the baby class, each time teacher Gloria say (for example, "The Solar System"), the kids must follow with a bow and say "Bow". Ezel does it very funny! He's nudging his and with smiling and say "bauww", and teacher Glo repeating it millions of times. Lol. And... Malik!!! OMG! He's soooooooo cute!!! He's like a small snowman with a bold eyebrow!! >_<. At the Nursery, I haven't known the kids yet. I only helped teacher Liana to look after the two kids (I forgot their names) while they're coloring some pictures.

They're going to have a graduation day on June 4th. I'm helping the teachers making hats and sticks for the kids' performance. So, after 12pm, it's cutting and glue-ing time! :p

I think that's all my story for now. I was just summing up my story because I was too tired to write them. I'm enjoying my work now. Some people can say that they love what they're doing, but not doing what they love or vice versa. But for me, I'm doing what I love and I, Definitely, Love what I'm doing!


Cherrio!